Space Needles and Gas ParksAugust 31

Seattle’s close to Canada, so I kept my hopes up that I might find Rachel there at last. Wasn’t there a movie about a guy and a girl who couldn’t sleep and fell in love in Seattle? Maybe that would happen for me and Rachel!

Rachel! Where are you?

At the top of the Space Needle?

No.

Does Rachel like sports?

I guess not, because she wasn’t at the Mariners-Yankees game. If only they were playing the Blue Jays instead!

Maybe I’d find her sipping coffee at the first ever Starbucks!

Nope. Sigh.

I was getting depressed so I stayed at the hotel and moped while corky and Clay went to some museums downtown.

While I was laying there, staring at the ceiling, thinking of my Rachel, my cute panda self came up with the most brilliant idea! I knew where I would find Rachel in Seattle!

GASWORKS PARK!

She would be waiting for me at the TAR3 finish line! I just knew it!

I made corky and Clay get up early and take me there.

I sat up high on the steps so I could watch for Rachel.

I waited.

And waited.

I kept looking over toward the finish line spot to see when she would come running toward me but all I ever saw was some guy doing Tai Chi.

It was time to leave for the airport to go home. Corky picked me up so I could take one last look around the park for Rachel before we left. She wasn’t there.

I guess I will have to keep looking!

Oh, Canada!August 29

For a little panda, I get around.

This week, corkystclair and mr. corky a.k.a. Clay Aiken took me on a long trip from my home in Washington D.C. to the west coast.

First stop: VEGAS, BABY, VEGAS!

All I can say is - what happened in Vegas stays in Vegas. I don’t want Rachel to get the wrong impression of me. I’ll just say that after the first night there, I spent the rest of the trip like this:

corky and Clay came back to the room to check on me and make me some coffee.

By the time we had to leave, I was feeling much better.

Our next stop was Vancouver, British Columbia. In Canada! Where Rachel lives!

I have some family in Vancouver, too – second cousins twice removed on my dad’s side. It was good to see them again.

We spent a day at Lynn Canyon. I’m kind of scared of heights, but I wanted to show Rachel that I can be a brave bear, so I walked across this suspension bridge. All by myself. With no leash.

The woods are so pretty and peaceful. I thought about the day I finally get to walk through the woods with Rachel, hand in hand. When corky and Clay weren’t looking, I carved Rachel’s initials into this bench.

The hike back up the canyon was exhausting! We had to stop halfway up so I could rest my legs.

When we got back to the car, corky and Clay were going to let me drive, but I think I was too tired. I almost drove us into the bushes.

I fell asleep in the back seat instead.

We visited the beautiful gardens of Dr. Sun Yat Sen. That visit made me hungry.

You can imagine why.

Corky and Clay insisted that I start expanding my palate. I’m glad they did because now if Rachel wants to go to dinner at a fancy restaurant, I’ll know what to order.

I searched high and low in Vancouver to find my Rachel.

I checked at the Totems.


No Rachel.

I checked the waterfront.

No Rachel.

I checked Stanley Park.


Still no Rachel!

I wanted to stay in Canada longer to look for her, but corky and Clay wouldn’t leave me behind all by myself, since I’m still kind of little and all. So off we went to Seattle.

Visiting Emjay and KonaKiniAugust 25

I stopped by emjaytee and KonaKini’s for a few days and I was glad to get out of there. It started out nice. Emjay showed me her garden.

I loved the lamb’s ears. They were soft but I didn’t see any lambs.

I was hungry and thought I found some bamboo. I was wrong. It was somebody named Holly. Hock was her last name I think.

I met their animals. They were almost too friendly.The dog was ok, but I have no idea what that cat was trying to do.


Although Gilda did help me see if Rachel might be lurking around outside. Nope, she wasn’t.

Emjay took me to work. Her cubicle scared me. Emjay says that the man in the picture is Jack Sparrow and that he’s adorable, but I was worried that he might be the type of pirate that would attack a poor little panda.

I met Stooge-a-holic! I told him to kiss my ass.

They took me around Pittsburgh where I met many new friends. This guy looks ferocious but he was a real sweety. He was careful with his claws so he didn’t hurt me.

We went to the point and I insisted on seeing where that pinhead who drives a motorcycle without a helmet plays football.


Then I saw some ducks and asked them to join us, but they weren’t as friendly as the dinosaur was. They quacked that they were busy.

KonaKini and I sunbathed for a while as emjaytee sat under a tree. She hates the sun?!?! I think she’s part vampire.

Then a terrible thing happened. We met a couple of nice guys who were playing with stuff in the park. The next thing I know, I’m up in the air and they’re laughing and my tummy was all a flutter and it wasn’t very fun at all.

I was so dizzy, I couldn’t walk straight.

I got back at emjay and Kona. I threw up somewhere and we’ll see how long it takes them to find it! Judging by their house, I’d say it’ll be Christmas…. 2008.

Tai Sham has left the buildingAugust 14

I arrived in Canandaigua, NY, at the home of Abiz and Ms. Abiz, and found myself in the midst of a heatwave. I didn’t mind going to Canandaigua, though, because I heard there was a fast ferry that goes from nearby Rochester to Toronto, where my beloved Rachel lives. One boat ride to paradise!

Wow, it was hot! It took me awhile to figure out their wacky thermometer, which showed it was more than 80 degrees inside the house. What kind of geeks don’t have a regular thermometer? (In fact, my panda senses tell me it was more like 92).

I tried to get back in the box to go back somewhere cooler, but Abiz said I was stuck here for now.

They gave me a hat and a cool drink, and I felt a bit better, and went to find out about how to get to the ferry.

Alas! The ferry business failed, and the ferry had stopped running! And now I was stuck in New York. So I decided to go check out the rest of the house.

Here I am chatting with some of the natives. The armadillos were particularly friendly.

This bear came all the way from Glacier National Park and he had a purple purse shaped like a trout. He also had a note saying, “You can use my fish purse!” I know better than to trust a grizzly with a purple purse, though. You never know what they have in there.

Gertrude the lobster has met miri and we shared stories about her. Gertrude said miri was there when Abiz got her for Ms. Abiz in Newport, RI.

Here I am with Big Gay Stan and Paul the Iguana. Stan seemed a little nervous about me being there and said that usually the carnivores were restricted to their own room. I explained that even though I am a bear, I eat bamboo. He still seemed nervous. I guess that’s how things are if you’re a rabbit in a pink jumpsuit.

I met these nice rabbits in the bottom of a closet. They didn’t seem frightened of me at all….

And then I discovered they had BIG POINTY TEETH! They were the most ferocious rabbits I’ve ever met. I was lucky to get out alive.

Fortunately, Star doesn’t seem that interested in playing with me.

Ellie wasn’t much of a conversationalist.

Corwen was more informative, but she swears like a sailor.

Gaby tried to wash my head…

but fortunately quickly discovered that pandas don’t taste like chicken.

The next day, it was cooler and I went to look around outside. Canandaigua is a sleepy resort town in the Finger Lakes area.

They have many Victorian houses, and some of them have been restored.

This one won a preservation award.

I checked out the light fixture. These people need to dust more often.

The Queen Anne stained glass window accented my fur nicely, though.

The next day Abiz said she was going to Memphis to a scientific meeting, and that I could come along if I wanted to. She said she was also going on a field trip to the Big Woods in the White River National Wildlife Refuge in Arkansas to look for endangered species. I’m an endangered species, so I thought I’d better go along. Maybe there would be other pandas!

Oddly the map doesn’t show any land managed for bamboo forest. It must be an omission!

I did a little more reading about the refuge, and discovered that it was sadly lacking pandas. But at least it is famous for being one of the last suspected locations for the Ivory-Billed woodpecker, one of the rarest birds in the world. Apparently the woodpecker is named “Elvis”.

Abiz also got us tickets to Graceland, and said if we were going to find Elvis, we’d probably find him there. I wasn’t sure what a woodpecker needed with a big mansion, though.

At the airport, I ran into a pig and a longhorn also going to Memphis, so we struck up a conversation and decided to travel together.

I invited them over to check out my accommodations at the Peabody Hotel in Memphis.

The three ducks on the pillow were confusing because I thought this was a four-star hotel, not a three-duck hotel. So I asked the concierge about it.

He directed us to the fountain in the center of the lobby, where we found five ducks. Lucky ducks!

As 5PM approached, suddenly there were hundreds of people crowding around the fountain. We had to watch from the balcony so I could see. The ducks got out of the fountain and marched on red carpet into the elevator, and then the bellman took them to the roof, where there is a “duck palace.” They sleep up there, and then come back down the next morning. I hope their palace is air conditioned; the outside temperature was 102.

That night we all had a good rest so we could get up early for the field trip to the White River National Wildlife Refuge.

We got lost along the way and I had to go ask directions from some locals.

Here I am in the sign at the Visitor’s Center. It was not a panda-friendly place.

O the indignity!

Soon we were out in the woods, looking for the woodpecker.

The manufacturer of the binoculars certainly didn’t take users without thumbs into consideration when they designed them.

However, I soon spotted an ivory-billed in a dead tree nearby.

Since I can climb trees, I went up for a closer look. He said his name was indeed Elvis asked me not to tell anyone I’d seen him. You know how secretive we endangered species can be. I promised not to tell.

After getting back from the field trip, I sat down with the program to plan which talks I would go see the next day.

I picked out one about reproduction in bamboo almost immediately. What could be more important?

I made sure to get a seat in the front row for the session about herbivores.

Here I am waiting for the session to begin.

I was disappointed there were not more talks about pandas, since we are famous herbivores.

After that, we went to go check out the poster session and the vendor/exhibitor’s area.

I found a book I needed right away.

The people from the Cambridge University Press thought I was so cute they tried to buy me for the display. Don’t they know you can’t buy cuteness?

I was starting to get hungry, so I stopped by the Forestry Suppliers booth. I was surprised to find they did not have bamboo. Isn’t bamboo a forest supply?

How did they know?

One evening, we rode on the trolley to Beale Street. My pig and longhorn friends joined me.

We stopped off at A. Schwab, which is a hardware store that’s been in business since 1876. I wasn’t allowed inside because Abiz didn’t want me getting mixed up with the toys there. How could anyone mistake me for a toy?

I didn’t understand why the pig and longhorn were getting so nervous.

By the end of our tour, we were getting a little giddy from all the music and beer.

The next morning I woke up and discovered I was on the street in front of some gates.

I climbed up on the stone fence to see what was around.

This sign clued me in that I was at Graceland, home of Elvis. I looked forward to seeing him again but didn’t see him around, though. Maybe he had left the building?

The pig and longhorn showed up for the tour, too. Here we are in front of Graceland.

Here I am in Elvis’ foyer. I think there’s definitely a resemblance, don’t you?

Some peacocks wait in the formal living room. I didn’t realize woodpeckers and peacocks hung out together.

That big white monkey in the TV room kind of creeped me out.

At long last, we reached the Jungle Room. I was disappointed that there wasn’t more bamboo. And those monkeys are still creeping me out. I thought the wall-to-wall avocado green shag carpet was swank, though.

I hurried along, hoping no one would think I had escaped from Lisa Marie’s toybox. I am not a toy!

What a woodpecker needs with all these giant gold CDs is beyond me.

How can you go wrong with a gold lamé cape?

I stopped to cool off by Elvis’ pool.

Elvis must have really loved pandas, because the gift shop was full of us!

Whew! After all that, I’m ready for a rest and to go on to my next destination.

Freedom in Fremont?August 9

After playing with M. Darcy’s ugly dolls some more, I found myself in a dark place. I bounced around a lot and then one day the bouncing stopped and I was being taken out of a box. At first I was excited because I was sure I was finally at my Rachel’s house but then I saw some kids. Rachel hates kids, so I knew I couldn’t be at her house.

It seems that I had been sent to visit MacMadame and her family. The little girl cub (they called her “Mini-Mac”) thought I was really cute and was very excited to see me. She wanted to take me with her everywhere she went. Unfortunately, she loved my leash just as much and wanted me to wear it everywhere, too.

MacMadame tried to explain that the leash was just for when it was dangerous for me, but Mini-Mac wouldn’t listen. MacMadame was annoyed but she didn’t cuff Mini-Mac in the head like my mom does when I’m being a pain. I guess human parents don’t do that. Somehow, I think that explains a lot.

MacMadame seemed less thrilled to see me than Mini-Mac. The first thing she said when she lifted me out of the box was that she’d heard what I was up to the last time I was in Northern California and there would be “none of that” while I was in her care. I’m not sure exactly what she meant by that, but I’m pretty sure that meant she wouldn’t be offering me any beer with my supper.

Sure enough we went to McDonalds that night and there was no beer there. Also, Mini-Mac wanted me to wear my leash to McDonalds. Mini-Mac said that McDonald’s was very dangerous. MacMadame gave in, much to my dismay. There is nothing dangerous about McDonald’s!

But then later when we were there, something happened that caused me to change my mind.

The next day, we went skating. MacMadame called it “ice dancing” which is a kind of figure skating that is even sissier than real figure skating. Mini-Mac tried to convince MacMadame that ice dancing is dangerous. MacMadame agreed but said a leash wouldn’t help me. I couldn’t figure out what she meant just then. After all, ice dancers don’t even do triple jumps, so how dangerous could it be?!

When we got to the rink, I decided to try ice dancing too. My Rachel is from Canada and I heard everyone there has to learn to skate or else they get deported. So I figured it was time to learn. I got Mini-Mac’s skates out of the bag but they didn’t fit me.

I had to wear rentals, which is not as cool. MacMadame lent me some gloves because it was cold at the rink and they weren’t cool either.

Then we started skating. At first, I was doing okay but I soon found out what MacMadame meant about it being dangerous. Some of those ice dancers were very FAST and they didn’t always watch out for a little bear like me.

MacMadame tried to explain about something called “session etiquette” and how couples doing the current dance had the right of way over bears, but I figured they were just jealous because I was such as good skater even though it was my first time. Either way, it seemed like a good time to take a break.

One of the cool things about ice dancing is that there are lots of pretty girls there. I asked one of the male skaters to give me some tips on how to pick up girl skaters. So he showed me how he does it.

Then, I heard another of the male dancers say he was going out for a “smoke”. I wasn’t sure what that was but I remembered that my Rachel is a “smoker” and so I went with him to see if Rachel might be there. He gave me something called a cigarette and I pretended to like it so he would think I was macho. But then MacMadame caught us and she was really mad! Plus Rachel wasn’t there after all.

At this point, MacMadame said I was a very bad bear and she was going to introduce me to something called “clean living”. I was dubious, but so far I haven’t been having much luck finding Rachel and I’m getting desperate enough to try anything. Even clean living.

MacMadame was kind of vague about what clean living was but apparently you can’t do it in Northern California because she said we were going to drive to Kansas City! I was excited to be going to Kansas because I figured I could visit Dorothy and she could get the wizard to send me Rachel! But MacMadame said Kansas City wasn’t in Kansas; it was in some place called Missouri. Well, it’s also in Kansas but we weren’t going to the Kansas City in Kansas, but the one in Missouri. I’m so confused. I do not think humans are good at naming things (though they did okay naming me).

But MacMadame said that not only will we find clean living there but it’s also East of here and so it’s closer to Rachel’s home. I thought about it and in the end I agreed to go with her.

The next morning, MacMadame, Mr. Mac and MacBoy (the boy cub) all started loading up the car. The first thing they had to do was take out a big tire full of holes that was sitting the back of their mini-van. I am pretty the spare tire is not supposed to look like that, but MacMadame told me not to worry about it because all the tires actually on the car were new. I tried not to worry but I’m a very young cub and I don’t want to die. Maybe driving to Kansas City is not such a good idea after all.

Then they crammed that mini-van with more stuff than I’d ever seen in one car before. I was impressed. Sort of.

The back of the mini-Van was full so I got into the front seat. But MacBoy said that was his seat. But there weren’t any more seats! I asked them where I was supposed to sit and MacBoy had some suggestions.

MacMadame rolled her eyes and said we were worse than MacBoy and Mini-Mac with our squabbling and she put me on the dash next to a weird box that talked.

Then she started the car. But instead of going “rrrrrrrr”, it went “clickity-clickity-clickity”. It seemed the battery was dead. I got very excited because of course we couldn’t go to Kansas City without a battery. But Mr. Mac gave us something called a “jump” and MacMadame drove to a car battery store and got a new battery.

Then we got on the freeway. I like driving on the freeway because you can go really, really fast. Except we weren’t going fast at all. Then we had to get off the freeway. It seems there was an accident and a tractor-trailer spilled acid all over the place and they closed the freeway. But eventually we got back on at a different spot and then we really started driving fast.

We drove. And drove. And drove.

After a while I suggested we play a car game. We decided to play a “drinking” game where you took a sip every time you saw a billboard and you “chugged” every time it said something about Jesus. MacMadame gave us all cans of something called “root beer”. Beer! Maybe she was kidding about that clean living stuff.

Except that “root beer” doesn’t look or taste like beer at all. It does coming in a silver can, but that’s as close as it gets to the real thing. Oh well, it wasn’t beer, but it wasn’t bad, either.

After that we drove for a very long time. So long that we ran out of that “root beer” stuff (there were a lot of billboards about Jesus). Then MacMadame started to get upset. It seems she forgot to buy gas when we stopped for dinner. (Talk about dumb.) So we used the talking to box to figure out where the nearest gas station was. It turns out that box is something called a “GPS” and it helps you find things - maybe I can use it find Rachel!

Unfortunately, the nearest gas station was over 20 miles away. MacMadame didn’t think we would make it so I suggested she put the car into neutral every time we went downhill. Luckily we had just passed the Tahoe National Forest and pretty much everything was downhill. After careening down the mountain for about fifteen miles, we coasted into a gas station and were able to get more gas. Tai Sham saved the day!

Now that everyone was calmer, I asked the talking box how to get to Rachel’s but it just said “bear left in 33 miles”. But there weren’t any bears (other than me) anywhere, let alone in 33 miles. Stupid box.

We drove some more after that until everyone was pretty tired. MacMadame wasn’t happy because we were supposed to be in some place called Salt Lake City but we were only in Wendover on the Nevada and Utah border. (Except she kept calling it Bendover - what is it with humans and names?)We stopped at a Motel 6 for the night even though there were lots of things called casinos to stay at. MacMadame said casinos aren’t a place to learn about clean living, but I think she is just cheap.

I tried to call Rachel from the hotel but MacMadame wouldn’t let me. She said long distance calls weren’t included. Motel 6 also does not have Internet access so MacMadame couldn’t check her email and MacBoy couldn’t play something called “World of Warcraft.”

MacMadame suggested we all read a bit before bed but all she had were romance novels. I tried one, but the plot was silly.

MacBoy only reads something called “manga”, but he already read all the manga he’d brought while we were in the car so he and I decided to go to bed while MacMadame finished her book.

The next day we had a bit more excitement because MacMadame thought she locked her keys in the car. But it turned out to be a false alarm. While she was running around trying to get back into the car, I found some beer! There wasn’t a lot left but I managed to get every last drop out.

We got on the road and drove some more. At lunch we stopped at McDonalds (again) even though MacMadame said that French Fries and Chicken McNuggets were not clean living. (Then why do we eat there so much?)

I got to eat something called a Happy Meal and it was so cool because when I got done with my meal, there was a prize at the bottom. If I ever go back to the zoo, I’m going to ask them to serve Happy Meals instead of all that bamboo.

For lunch we went to a real restaurant instead of McDonalds. It was in Wyoming so I looked for cowboys. I’m pretty sure my Rachel likes cowboys because Kiefer Sutherland is a cowboy. In fact, I think he has a ranch in Wyoming so the entire time we were there, I looked for my Rachel. I didn’t see any cowboys (or Rachel) at the diner but I did meet a Jackalope. I asked him if he’d seen my Rachel but he hadn’t.

Then we also stopped at something called “Wal-mart” even though MacMadame said it was evil. But MacBoy needed a toothbrush. On the way out, there was a wall of missing people. I got excited again since Rachel is missing! At least I’m missing her. So maybe she was on the wall. I made MacMadame bring me over and we looked and looked, but my Rachel wasn’t there anywhere. So we got back on the road and kept going.

We drove pretty far that day and after a while looking out the window got boring so I decided to listen to some tunes.

I also convinced MacBoy to lend me his cell phone so that I could try to call Rachel without MacMadame having a cow. But then I realized I didn’t know her number. Stupid cell phone.

That night we stopped in Lake Ogallala (see, I told you human’s are bad at naming places) and the place we stayed that night had Internet access so MacBoy and I got to finally play “World of Warcraft”. MacBoy is a good player and he got me to level “31″. Apparently girls are impressed by stuff like that. At least that’s what MacBoy said. I hope Rachel is impressed.

The next was our last day on the road. That means we were almost to Kansas City! That’s when I found out we weren’t going to visit the wizard but to see something called “gymnasts” who were competing at something called the “US Classic”. MacMadame seemed very excited to see the “gymnasts” and said they were “elites” and could teach me all about clean living. I was not impressed.

One thing I have not mentioned yet is how hot it’s been. It was pretty hot in California. It was pretty hot in Nevada. Utah and Wyoming were okay because we were mostly in the mountains. But then we got to Nebraska and it was pretty hot in Nebraska. I wasn’t happy about this, but luckily MacMadame’s car had air conditioning and a big cooler full of soda. (It would have been better if it had been beer. Not root beer - real beer.)

So we drank a lot of soda and that kept us cool. Unfortunately, beer isn’t the only thing that should be nicknamed “Vitamin P”.

Some of the places we stopped at were not panda-friendly like the Motel 6 was. This one place had a big sign by the door saying No Animals.

I was not happy because I really had to pee and I did not want to have another accident like I did in Hollywood. But MacBoy said he could sneak me in. Not only did he get me in before it was too late, he showed me how to pee like a big boy!

I am starting to like that MacBoy even if he keeps stuffing me into weird places and saying I’m annoying.

While we were waiting for MacMadame to pee (why do girls take so long to pee? I hope my Rachel isn’t like that), I found some cars to practice my driving.

I got pretty good with the toy cars so then I tried to drive the real car. But since I’m such a little bear, I couldn’t steer and also press the gas pedal, so I had to give up and let MacMadame drive.

In spite of MacMadame’s fussing, we got into Kansas City with plenty of time to spare. First we checked into the hotel.

Then we went shopping for things she forgot.

The next day we got up early and had breakfast at the hotel.

Then we went to the “venue” and set up. Mr. Mac wasn’t there to help us so I had to help.

Then MacMadame tried to teach me how to shoot gymnastics so I could help out. I did my best but I don’t pandas are cut out to be sports photographers.

So after that I stayed in the booth and helped out there.

This is when I found out that “gymnasts” are actually “cute girls”.

I really liked helping them and I sold them lots of “images.”

I wanted to get closer to the gymnasts so first I tried to dress like them. I tried on a “leo” but I don’t think I’m really a “leo” kind of bear.

Then I put a “scrunchie” in my hair. All the gymnasts wear scrunchies. I think it helps them with their tumbling runs - it gives them extra power or something.

I also met another bear while we were at the “US Classic”. She was helping out in the booth next to ours.

We talked for a bit but she didn’t know where Rachel was so I decided to pass the time by entering the competition.

First I had some of the gymnasts show me their moves.

Then it was my turn.

I had a great vault.

The judges must have agreed because they gave me a “10” and that means “perfect.”

Except MacMadame says that “10” doesn’t mean perfect any more and 10 is not actually that great score for a vault at this level. I’m sure she must be mistaken.

So I moved on to the beam.

The beam was fun, but I enjoyed chalking up for the bars the best.

Then I did my bar routine including my “pak”. (Only the very top gymnasts do a “pak” on bars.)

Finally, I got to show my dance moves on the floor exercise. I really got the crowd going with my routine to music from Pirates of the Caribbean.

In the end, I won the All-Around in the bear division!

After that the competition was over so we had to pack up and leave.

Even though I had a good time, I was disappointed because a) clean living is hard and b) I never saw my Rachel. I guess she doesn’t go to gymnastics competitions. I asked MacMadame to take us to a hockey game instead, but she said that they had no ice rinks in Kansas City so we were going to a casino. That’s even better - if my Rachel is anywhere in Kansas City, I bet it’s in a casino!

First we went to the buffet for dinner. It was all you can eat. So I did.

Then I ate some more.

Then we walked to the casino area. I knew my Rachel would be there because they have “blackjack” and “poker” there and also you can smoke and drink. I was so excited. Except on the way, some strange guy reached around and whacked MacMadame and MacBoy in the head for no reason! I wanted to tear his arm off and eat it but MacMadame decided it would be better to just call “security”. So they did. But “security” couldn’t do anything because it was his word against ours as to what had happened.

MacMadame and MacBoy were kind of freaked out by now so we skipped the casino and went back to the hotel to pack.

I was disappointed not to see the casino or meet Rachel and I still think I should have eaten that man who hit us.

But MacMadame said I’d have even more fun at my next destination and it was even closer to Rachel’s place. I hope my next adventure has just as many pretty girls and medals. But a lot less driving.

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